British Prime Minister Boris Johnson has proposed the deployment of Terminators to patrol the land border with Northern Ireland.
The Etonian Lizard, who recently discovered an old VHS copy of James Cameron’s sci-fi classic, believes the Terminators will resolve the point of contention around the border in The Irish Sea.
“There are several options, and they’re all jolly exciting,” burbled the scaly flesh sac. “There’s these T-800s, which look like Arnie. They’re slow moving but rather effective in checking trucks at the border and crushing Article 16
Then we have these marvellous T-1000s. These chaps are practically indestructible. I was amazed to see them turn into little pools of liquid before coming back together, much like a refreshing glass of Pimms.”
It is understood that the T-1000s rapid transit capabilities could also be deployed to stop Covid-19 crossing the border.
“The possibilities are endless,” said Johnson. “And the good news for the British tax-payer is that Terminators work for zero wages. All we need provide are our clothes, our boots and our motorcycles.”
Skynet officials confirmed that they are in discussions with the UK government, but admitted previous talks ended abruptly after the Westminster delegation was distracted by a passing squirrel.